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Life may not have a plan, project, purpose or meaning. Life may not control anything, anyone let alone itself.

It is no longer possible for me to steer life from one place to another. Life flits around doing its own thing. I watch with surprise or shock, my responses flitting too, at the speed of life.

Life makes plans impossible. Causes errors, embarrassment, apologies. Dates, times or places honoring best friends whose names are forgotten. Life continues to throw projects at my feet while she flits.

I love projects. I'll carry a heavy project through fog, mud, ice to near completion where it falters from vigor and cost. Just a few words, at the appropriate time, hold my senses together — "Now. Breathe. Be. Imagine."

What is life without purpose or meaning, a reason to live, that for which one is destined — changing the world, or something, or someone? My truth informs me, "It's impossible. If It doesn't happen, it doesn't matter."

Life is flitting my planet's magnetic field around — gravity, rotational speed, time-change, melting ice, tiny tornados, temperature shifts. Some human person believing she or he controls the outcome. No, I don't think so.

Life may not have a plan, project, purpose or meaning. Life may not control anything, anyone let alone itself. It's OK, we are here, now, alive, together. This is good, even if there is no next time. I'll fall in love with life again.

Norma Heyser is a member of the Jottings Group at the Lake Oswego Adult Community Center.


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