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(It's 'to go boldly')(It's a classic!)(It's a split infinitive)(Look, shut up and post my photos)(You shut up)

PMG PHOTOS: JOHN BAKER AND HIS HOWLING COMMANDOS - To almost everyone's surprise, Balloon Master never hit it big with the Justice League.  Upon hearing that Wizard World comic book convention would be held Friday, Saturday and Sunday at the Oregon Convention Center, John Baker, mild-mannered editor of the Canby Herald, changed into his costume and attended to ward off evil. Meanwhile, erstwhile but clueless Dana Haynes, editor of the Portland Tribune, was stuck wrestling with captions. Unlike Baker, Haynes had never been bitten by a radioactive nerd and did not know most of the characters in the photos. Despite this, the heroic duo did their best to nerd-out.

Wizard World continues through Sunday, Jan. 26, at the Convention Center, 777 N.E. Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd. Hours are 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Saturday and 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday. Go to the Wizard website for more information. Crimson Bands of Cyttorak sold separately."Beethoven's Sith," or "Random Acts of Violins." (Pamplin Media Group would like to apologize in advance for these captions.)Friends don't let friends drive ignited.Captain Hook and a Viking; we're getting a nautical theme here.

PMG PHOTO: JOHN BAKER, SORCERER SUPREME, CANBY DIVISION - And the Riddler would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn't been for you meddling teens and your dog.For those of you who believe newspaper editors are incapable of making a freaking decision: ladies and gentlemen, the unending table of dice.The never-ending hunt for that one pristine issue to fill out the Silver Age run of your favorite comic book.The Portland Tourism Bureau and Lucille the Bat would like to welcome you to Portland. Please enjoy your stay.

One guest came outfitted as Pikachu, which is a Pokémon. Wikipedia insists on referring to Pokémon as "fictional creatures," just in case anyone's confused.A Captain America with a rainbow flag. (Caption writer Haynes had nothing clever to say about this, other than liking the sentiment.)A guest sporting the latest coiffure a la "Dragon Ball Z."Portland being a dangerous city, one guest wisely brought her own light saber. Caption-writer Dana Haynes, with insufficient caffeine to do justice to this image, assumes it's a combination of Harry Potter's Alastor 'Mad-Eye' Moody, right, and "The Magicians" Professor Mayakovsky. Or, possibly two other characters whom Haynes is insufficiently cool to recognize.A small Rey of hope in an otherwise dystopian convention. Musical guests at Wizard World include School of Rock.Canby Editor John Baker traveled through the Spider-Verse en route to the Convention Center, thus bypassing the traffic on I-5.(Image is Clickable Link) The Wizard World convention brought several Mandalorians to Portland. For convention purposes, Mandalorians differ from Rotarians thusly: One carries a traditional Mandalorian saber, primarily forged from nearly indestructible beskar iron; the other does volunteer services.

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